Never say this to your child!

The fundamental message behind Lazy parenting has always been that we need to build a strong relationship with our children built on mutual respect. I strongly believe that it is impossible to raise healthy, happy, independent, empathetic young adults if our relationship with them doesn’t have this strong foundation. When our children don’t trust us, they don’t respect us. And that trust comes slowly, over time by us proving to our child that we are there for them in the good and bad times and that we always have their best interest at top of mind. Trust takes years to build but only an instant to break. And this goes both ways...it’s a message our kids need to understand, especially as they begin to gain independence and start to make their own decisions. They need to understand that when they break our trust through lies or deceit, it will take time to earn that trust back.

Now, understanding this and committing to this as the basis of all our parenting brings a new way of looking at our child’s behaviour. It means that we always have to look at our child’s behaviour from their perspective, from a lens of trying to understand the where and why the behaviour is coming from. And, being honest with ourselves that it is often our own constructs, our own hangups, our own issues from our own childhood that get in the way of this.

One of the times we often respond in a way that is not at all helpful is when our children are angry, upset, or crying and we say the words…

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Fostering Resiliency in our Children so They Know They Can Do Hard Things

We are in a hard season. There is no doubt about it. And, depending on where you are living --- the uncertainty of the election happening right now in the US is just one more pile of bricks loaded onto your back making the weight of motherhood, parenting, living….that much harder.

I talk often about how we as the parents HAVE TO work on ourselves so that we can become the best, the strongest, the most resilient version of ourselves so that we can be the model to which our children look.

I believe the best way to help our children through these times is to shape the lessons they are going through. To do this, we have to INTENTIONALLY manage our own feelings and actions knowing that they are what our children are seeing. They are looking to us to see how they should be feeling.

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Turn your child’s behavior around before 2021 | #26

In today’s episode, I share 10 steps you can take TODAY that will help get your family and relationship with your kids back on track so that 2021 is better than today. I promise, that if you follow the steps outlined that you will see a dramatic improvement in your child’s behavior.

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Virtual Classes - Homeschooling Without Conflict | #22

WEEK EIGHT!!! Can you believe it? How are you holding up? Hopefully, where you are finally beginning to see some light at the end of the tunnel! It might only be a glimmer but around the world, we are beginning to see some loosening up of the social-distancing rules. For many of us parents, it is now week 4 or 5 of virtual school/homeschooling with our kids. All across North America and possibly the world, schools are shut down to in-class lessons, and all the learning is now happening 100% through an online or a distance learning model. With 1 or 2 more months left in the school year depending on where you live, it is unlikely we will see our kids returning to regular school days until next year. In today’s episode, I am sharing 7 strategies that I encourage you to use to WIN the homeschooling game -- without yelling! Think it’s impossible? Click the audio link to listen in and implement them and see the difference for yourself.

Be The Leader Your Kids Need You To Be | #21

WOW - In real-time, I am recording this podcast at the beginning of WEEK SEVEN of self-isolation here in Vancouver, BC. The idea for this podcast came to me when I was leading an online Zoom practice for my cheer team and I asked them why they weren’t joining me for my live 8 am workouts that I was leading on our team Instagram page. Many of them told me that they just aren’t awake at 8 am. They told me they are sleeping in until at least 10 am, some till noon, and one of them told me she had just woken up (it was 4 pm!) And this blew me away! I asked what time she went to bed and she said 5 am. I’ll be honest with you...I don’t get it! I don’t understand why they are being allowed to do this. I think it is crazy! Now...you may not agree with me BUT - I firmly believe that holding our children and ESPECIALLY OUR TEENS to a schedule that resembles their regular school day is important if we want to be raising kids who can handle adversity, can see this as a time to set some goals and reach them AND if our relationship with them is going to thrive and grow instead of having one that is riddled with one argument after another until quite frankly, I believe many parents just throw their hands up and give up.

That is not how the world works. If anything, this quarantine is showing up and teaching us a whole lot about ourselves and our ability to stay positive, stay healthy, set goals, follow a plan, and do the things/have the habits that will ensure we walk out of our houses stronger, healthier, happier, more centered and knowing what we want than we were 2 months ago before this all began.

I know this one thing --- I want to walk out of this house all of that! I don’t want to look back at these weeks and think of what I could have accomplished. I don’t want to remember fighting with my kids, I don’t want to remember them locked up in their rooms all day long. I don’t want to remember yelling and fighting between the siblings or with me. And further, I want my KIDS to remember this time as an opportunity that they took advantage of. That they didn’t have a victim mentality and just waste the days away playing video games, scrolling social media, and isolating themselves away from the family. I want us as a family to look back at this time and remember the nightly game nights we played, the laughs we had, the meals we all ate together, the roasting of marshmallows we did, the long walks we took, the fitness programs we all participated in, the home projects that we all took part in to make our house cleaner, more organized and more livable. I want them to remember that we LIVED during this time. That we LOVED during this time AND that we ACCOMPLISHED the goals that we had.

In today’s episode, I share FIVE tips/strategies that we as parents need to work on if we are to be an effective and inspiring leader of our family.

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10 Tips for Parenting Your Unreasonable Child

Don’t perceive your child's behavior as coming from a reasonable place - it isn’t! They aren’t reasonable beings...They do most of the behaviors that annoy us out of impulse, out of stress, out of emotion --- which are all heightened right now. And in your house, if you have a new baby, a new pet, a new parent home, new schooling schedules --- so many new things!

By definition - unreasonable means “not guided or based on good sense”. Well if there was ever a word that described children this would be it!

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No Excuses - MAKE your Kids exercise while in self-isolation | #18

On episode #18 Host, Stephanie Kennedy reviews week 3 of self-isolation during Covid19. She discusses the one thing that has become CRYSTAL CLEAR as we navigate this new and uncharted territory of parenting through this crisis -- that our number one priority needs to be the mental health of our children. Stephanie discusses the number one way that we, as parents, can manage this; by ensuring that our children’s’ PHYSICAL HEALTH is set as the top priority. Now more than ever, behavior problems, conflict, and stress between family members for example, often stem from the basic principle that they aren’t moving their bodies enough to manage the stress, to ward off the depression, to tackle the boredom and/or the feeling like they aren’t accomplishing anything.

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A Parent's Guide to TikTok | #17

So what is this app that your child is spending hours and hours on? You have heard them talk about it, you have seen them making up dances, and you see them spending hours and hours consuming content.

So what is Tiktok? Well, it is a free social media app that lets the user create, share and watch videos -- often to soundtracks of popular music. It has over 100 million users. And, it has become so popular that there are now Tiktok “celebrities” that are making 100’s of thousands of dollars in revenue creating content.

If you are like many parents, your child is probably on this app and you probably aren’t.

In today’s episode, I share my deep dive into this app, what I learned, what I saw, what I am concerned about and what I think are things you should be sure to educate yourself about if you choose to allow your child to use it.

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5 Things Thank Week One of This Crisis Has Taught Me | #16

We are now one week deep into the global crisis that has descended on Canada. Yes, it has been going on for longer than that, but this week we went from a world where businesses were running as normal, people were out and about enjoying the parks, the libraries, the cafes and the movie theaters. And now, we are all sequestered in our homes, venturing out only to get groceries and to go to work. No extended family dinners, no playing on the playground, no going out for dinner or even to Starbucks. Our world has changed. Our day to day is drastically different than it was a week ago.

In today's episode, I share 5 tips or strategies that I believe to be essential things to think about as we move into the next few months. As all this craziness gets crazier, we will need to keep the physical and mental health of our families at the forefront. We need to check our own physical and mental health so we can lead our family through this challenging time and make it through to the other side stronger, closer, better connected and able to navigate whatever our new normal turns out to be.

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No School, Now What? How to keep our kids safe & busy during this uncertain time. |#15

So here we are...in real time, smack dab in the middle of a global crisis... Well, what I hope is the middle although it might likely be just the beginning. This episode is being released on Tuesday, March 17th...here in Canada the Prime Minister just announced that our borders were closing to anyone except Canadians and US citizens...Community centers, libraries, pretty much all public places are closing their doors. I announced today that my own business, a children’s cheer & tumbling facility was suspending all programming for the next 2 weeks. All sporting events, concerts, all public gatherings have been canceled. The economy is struggling with the markets dropping “Social-distancing’ has become a common household term. People are being asked to work from home. Many people are being laid off. Schools have been canceled with no re-start date confirmed. Parents are having to think fast about how they will hunker down and survive the next few weeks, at home with all their kids….and amongst all this chaos...there are those of us who understand that we get to CHOOSE how we react to these circumstances...we can’t change what is happening, we can’t alter the course that is going to unfold...but we CAN choose how we react, how we behave in front of our children, how we control and mold the experience our children have through this time...we CAN make the best of this! In today’s episode, I am going to break down how you can not only survive through this time with your children at home but how you can THRIVE and strengthen your relationship with your kids, how you can ensure that they learn and grow and remember this time as one that was amazing - because they got to spend time with their parents in a way that they haven’t been able to before.

So what is this magic I talk about - how can you make this time with your children special and manageable and not just something you survive - barely - going to bed frustrated and angry and at wit’s end (although let’s be honest, there will be days that are harder than others). Well, as any good teacher or coach knows...the old adage “if you fail to plan, you plan to fail!” is going to hold true for all the parents out there...

Why is Teen Anxiety Is at an All-Time High and What Can Parents Do About It?

70% of teens say that anxiety and depression are major problems amongst their peers. There has been a 20% increase in the diagnosis of teen anxiety between 2007-2012. The latest studies show that One in three teens suffers from an anxiety disorder. On top of this, the suicide rate in teens has doubled over the past decade. Teens and anxiety is a real problem. So what can we do about it as parents? How can we work towards recognizing the stressors that exist for our children? The world they are growing up in is a different one than ours was...war across the borders, unstable leadership at the government level, school shootings & lockdowns and a physical environment, the planet itself that is in serious peril...so while these particular ones may be out of our control as parents, today, I am going to talk about the ones we DO have control over. In today’s episode, I am going to discuss 10 things that we as parents can do to reduce the stress and anxiety our teens feel. Many of the things I discuss today are going to be things that as parents, we need to be aware of. That we need to hold in check when our kids are small so that they don’t grow into bigger problems as the teen years hit. I’m going to ask you to be honest with yourself today. Take a real check of yourself and your behavior, of your household and how it is run, and what messages you might inadvertently be sending your kids…

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Lazy and Entitled Kids - 10 Parenting Tips You Need to Revisit TODAY (Part 2) | #12

Welcome Lazy Parents! Funnily enough, we are talking about lazy kids today….and not Lazy in a good way like I am encouraging you to be! Lazy kids who don’t help around the house, who expect you to do all the things for them, who lock themselves in their room, who spend hours on screens, kids who don’t understand and blow up at you when you don’t give them what they want when they want it. Today’s episode is part 2 in which I share tips 6-10 to help your kids become more caring, more involved and more grateful! From exercise to chores, to forced family time and reading & music!

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Do You Have Lazy & Entitled Kids? 10 Parenting Tips You Need to Revisit TODAY! | #11

I seem to be seeing a lot of posts on social media about “entitled kids”, lazy kids, kids who don’t appreciate all that they have, kids who don’t help around the house and yet expect their parents to cater to their every whim. And, the people who comment on these posts are all in agreement, all sharing in the difficulty that is parenting. Parents who are all feeling helpless and overwhelmed with fear of what their kids are turning in to….wondering where did they go wrong? What is the right thing to do? How much therapy is my child going to need in the future????

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